I'm still a 'mo

I've neglected this part of my internet life for quite a while. Life. I should have just been honest and said life. Because this is a blog.. I shall moan...

I have no job, no money, and no erm lovin. I'm quite pleased with the last part though.

So, I'm feeling what I've not felt in a while... I think I'm beginning to care again, I do blame pokemon, for taking away my life, pokemon and other things, but these shall be enjoyed only for a few hours a day, or perhaps every other day.

TransAction is not dead, though I cant log into my account on the comicgenesis site, I can still log into the Ftp. Which, seeing as all the stats and data are on the comicgenesis site this upsets me. Not that I get many views, but it's always exciting seeing what people have typed to get to my comic. Though there was nothing amusing there so far.

I seriously suspect pokemon has made me autistic. And that's it for now. I might delete a load of these entries, and this one later, an "revamp" the whole thing. Maybe, but, I may care these days, doesnt mean I'm willing to put time into things.

Sharing your shower time with a Ladybird is not a stressfree experience

I've had to put up with sharing my shower time with spiders, even a moth that one time but trust me, a ladybird is the freakiest. Especially this one. It didn't seem like your regular ladybird, it didn't have a black head, it was yellow and it had spider like reflexes. I had to keep an eye on it whilst showering, because you know, if it decided to attack me, I'd have to stagger some sort of self defense move, but if taken by surprise I'd mess it up, and slip and crack my head and die. Phew, glad I got out of that one alive. Also I can't squirt water at it so it goes down the plug hole and drowns, I'm just not that cruel.

Though when I made it safely out of my shower and looked back it had gone... now I'll be questioning whether it really ever was there in the first place, and was it a symbol, or methaphor for my life, with its struggling to climb the tiles rife with condensation and almost falling then falling, being on it's back on a tile edge then managing to pick itself up again though deciding it was just going to climb down this time.... unfortuatly this will stick in my head till something else manages to occupy it.

To those adoring fans of TransAction you may have noticed there were no updates last week. "Why? Oh Why?" you ask. Well... er... I dunno, I should have been able to update, seeing as I've finished Uni now, I managed to have two updates each week when I also had my exams, but now I have nothing surely I should be able to just update update update. Unfortuatly, now exam stress has gone it's been replaced with house finding and job finding stress, also CV writing stress, all this makes me want to not do anything, so I sit in front of the comp, with a box of red wine watching Kelly Clarkson videos on youtube. I think it's time I motivated myself. Yes, it really was a low point. Still you love box wine and Kelly Clarkson! and nope, fuck you, I will not feel ashamed.

I guess it's about time I either...
a) make a coffee and watch Kelly Clarkson on youtube.
b) make a coffee and finish off my CV.
c) make a coffee and draw transaction.
d) go back to bed.

I guess I should merge b) and c), I know though a) will creep in but as tempting as d) is I must resist at all costs.

Damn you Comic Gen!!! or Universe.. maybe both

Here's my first doodle, no second doodle on here. It's my myspace background, fascinating stuff.

So, instead of holding TransAction back to concentrate on exams, it seems I've dedicated more time into TransAction than ever before. I came close to giving up all, but decided to just improve my art instead. Hopefully it'll be looking more polished and cleaner in the future.

Oh my point. Comicgen has been crappy all week. I've uploaded a comic for today (Thursday) but with 2500 odd queuing to be updated it may not actually show today, or tomorrow. Gnnnwah! Oh well. I know I got it done in time.

And now to leave you with my favourite new drawing of Sam, as she's my favourite (I'm always drawn to the lame ones, well, I'm spoilt for choice with TransAction really).




(edit: I'm tired and too lazy to correct the bad grammer and awful sentence structure, but not too lazy to note it)

I have exams

So transaction is taking a break, maybe.

Nothing says “I’m ignoring you revision” like…

BAKING CAKES!!!

Well, it’s not really baking is it if I only add an egg and water to some cake mix? But, it took away a good 30 minutes of my life, so, that’ll do.

A lot has happened since the last update. (Nothing too spectacular, unless, like me, you think celebrating your birthday and getting a hamster (not in that order) is really quite something.)

So first off, ooh, I can bring the cakes back. I brought cake mix to take my mind off some essays, but I needed eggs and couldn’t find them, I did ponder the possibility of a nation wide egg shortage, till I found the eggs in the place I weren’t looking for them. I assumed they’d be in the chill cabinets, but nope.

With the cakes not working and the constant worry of essays I decided to get a hamster. To take my mind off things. It worked, I almost took my mind off too much. But now all I seem to do is worry about Garth (the hammy). When I’m not pestering him and googling hamster illnesses (I should never be allowed a child. Good job I don’t want one), I’m thinking of ways to expand his cage, and daydreaming about all the toys he could have. Here’s the set up for now…

It was my Birthday may 5^th, and the fam came up. Mum, Dad and sister. We watched “Spiderman 3”, aww it was nice they’d sit through that for me. I took a moment. They seemed to like it, which was good. Did I like it? Hmm, it was no “Spiderman 2”, it has absolutely amazing moments, the cgi and action scenes were fantastic, but if all you can say about a film is that its action sequences were good, then the films failed. Also, some bits should never have been put to film. Ah well, at least it wasn’t as uncomfortable as “Notes on a Scandal”, I left that film a little more homophobic and Gerontophobic than when I entered. You could blame me, I blame the film. No way am I trusting old ladies, if one comes to talk to me, I’m getting the fuck away.

After “Spiderman 3” we went for an Indian, it was nice, I made a social faux-paus and split wine all over the table. How we laughed. It was fun, and typical.

Now I’ll leave you with a picture of Garth.

Update update update

The beautiful piece of tacky crap is mine, all mine, (I'm talking about the wonder woman wallet, for anyone slow on the mark today).

So this weeks transaction, you may have noticed I skipped a week, I could blame easter, or the fact that drawing people was difficult and took me a while, which it did, but really to go all emo on you, I wasn't feeling it/anything. I was having one of those weeks were I thought too much. Way too much, and when I think that's when everything turns to shit. I'm convinced (but this is probably due to my pessemistic nature) that if anyone worked out the meaning of life, it would be so depressing they'd top themselves right there and then. I'm not getting you down at all, am I?

But now I'm not thinking and just doing and everythings a-ok! Woop woop woop.

I ordered The Children's Hour, I'm convinced it will arrive today, but it's getting on in the day with no post yet... oh, this could sour the day. Even though I'm sure watching it would sour the day anyway.

Down the road I go, I am following my fishie. La la laaaa

Today was spent first with irrelevant internet usage, then some half arsed tidying as I washed some clothes. I spent the rest of my time till now (and a brief trip to spar) reading The Sandman, “The Kindly Ones”. It’s a pretty thick book for those who don’t know, and I fear reading so much over so many hours has affected my brain. As it does always, if I invest too much time in something, it becomes my life till my attention wanders elsewhere. This probably explains the running narration I’ve had since I put the book down. Every step I’ve recalled in third person narrative. I blame reading, and it is unsettling, especially since the narrative is clunky, sometimes inaudible and profoundly dull. Worrying times.

I’m hoping with my trip to spar for yet another biscuit quest that once I’ve made some tea and dunking some limited edition digestives into it; my mind will be settled, or, like most things, maybe I’ll have to sleep it off.

There will be only one update for transaction this week. I could blame comicgenesis, but I know deep down that is just an excuse. Though my next update will take some time, it will be a “Where’s Wally?” but a friends affair. Cheap? Perhaps. I’d like to think it a treat. Those who know will know and those who don’t may never know. I like that thought. This update (the one I’m working on now) has been postponed due to a belief that comicgenesis (the site I host off) is having troubles and I best wait it out, though I’ve not gone to check if it is backed up with thousands of sites in a queue to update yet. It will be updated when I’m ready, but I’m stuck on one line, and I can’t think how it is best to phrase it. I know in the end, I’ll be unsatisfied with it, but I think “I can always revamp, and touch up on the 20 year anniversary special edition”. Some may hate me for it, but I know there will be a few out there, who are thankful but are too concerned they’ll be met with shame if they were to confess this to their friends.

I like it when blogs have pictures, this one is of my goldfish's grave. Yes, I did make a tomb stone.

It's not emo just yet.

Today I saw a black cat sleeping in our back garden. I took a picture, as you can see. The cat resembles our Tobes, it was a nice moment, looking out, watching this little cat that is my cats’ doppelganger taking a nap. Being in Lancaster though feeling I was a little in Widnes at the same time. And no, not all black tabby cats look the same, some cats are bigger than others…

We have a new edition to the goldfish tank family. Purchased by my housemate, I forget the name of the fish already but that’s not important, what is important is it’s the second coolest goldfish I’ve seen in my lifetime (second only of course to Buffys Mom, may she rest in peace). It’s literally a fat little orange blob with eyes and fins… you should see it “swimming” it just blobs about, it’s fantastic.

Tonight I don’t think I’ll be getting much sleep. I saw a huge and I’m not kidding, HUGE fucking spider in the corner of my room. 2cm body huge. I turn my back for what, 2 minutes just tidying up a bit (the removal of a spider from a room is not simply a case of catching it in a glass… my room is cluttered, and felt that for this operation to be a success I first needed to tidy up a little, I moved my washing so my door can be easily opened wide, I also created a path- some may say an escape route, for if anything were to go wrong with this manoeuvre, I would have a clear exit.) anyway, I turn back and the fucker has gone.

I went to close the curtains and spied the little bastard scuttling behind my radiator, I should add my radiator is behind the head of my bed. Tonight will be spent spying out the corner where I first spotted the foe, and also around the radiator area. I won’t be sleeping till the bastard is caught, or till I get so incredibly tired I cease to care if a fatty spider crawls all over my face during the night. The latter has on occasion happened before. Well the sleeping, I can’t be sure if the spider did take advantage of me. I’m tired already. I might doss down on the sofa in the kitchen.

This method is a favourite fail safe, I call it “The Sofa Option”. I recall an incident of a fly, a huge fly, with big orange eyes that creeped me out once back in Widnes, I tried various methods of shoo’ing the fly away, one involved throwing rolled up socks at it, the socks didn’t have the desired effect and went out the window onto the front lawn. Explaining to your parents why your socks are on the front lawn because of a scary fly incident is usually met by suspicion and an oh-dear-god-we-raised-a-crazy look. Well, because I ran out of options (and socks) I had to sleep on the sofa in the front room.

I’m giving up msn by the way. It’s being crap and it’s annoying me, I can only take so much. I’m sure someone will inform me if it gets better, who knows though, without msn I might actually be on my way to creating some sort of meaningful life for myself. Or I need to find another excuse.

continued from transaction update 27/03/2007

... here.

So, I've been feeling a tad guilty that my updates have been late. For two weeks I was well on schedule, and then I fell back into just updating once on the Friday, and now I have no excuse really, because I don't have Uni to go to anymore.
This comic is what has been referred to by a third party as a "lazy day comic" haha, and really it is. It took 70% less time than last week’s comic update. I can either pass off the look of this comic as "artistic effect; they're nervous, and so they're shaking" or, general laziness. haha, it works. so shh.

I thought it might be an idea (just an idea, neither good nor bad, a neutral idea) that I would go through my writing process. Because you never know, someday, somewhere, someone, may care. This blog is transaction related after all, let us never forget that.

I'll talk through briefly the process I use. Though to even suggest it's a process may be misleading. It's just a way really.
Ok, so I don't know if this is typical or not but I start with dialogue. Of course there's a vague concept of what's happening bopping around in the back of my mind but dialogue is the main focus. I hear words, sentences playing out a scenario in my head, and then if I like it, I write it down.... as you can see.

It usually changes as I go along, but the basic idea is there. I write it so I know in my head who's speaking, sometimes I bother to write out, Br (for Brian), B (Becks), S (Sam). The numbers are to do with pixels and things, it's not important.
(And as today was a "lazy day" update the governmentesque blacking out is what's going to happen on the next comic, initially, all that was there was supposed to happen in just one comic, but I spread it out... oh. genius. I know).

Then when I'm happy with the dialogue I think as to where to place the characters, the reactions, and how it will translate on paper. Usually I'm playing a 3D birds eye view or movie shot sequence of the events, and from there I try and place it on paper... I do a real rough outline of what I'm hoping to achieve...

It's pretty rough, and subject to change. From that, I take an A4 sheet and start marking out where everything should be, and then I begin to draw it. (simple enough).

I scan this in, then do the outline.

Colour it in, then do the borders and frames.

Then the dialogue and the speech bubbles come last.

It's a lengthy process I tell ya.

There we go, and that's basically it. If I bother to read "How to write..." books my method may change, but I'm a lazy sod, and my way is working alright for me at the moment, I'm quite interested (if no one else is) if I change how I do this in the upcoming years... (I have a good few years of ideas I want to get out- though it sometimes feels I'll never even get to finishing this initial arc. haha, I blame the lazy days).

So enough about what this blog is supposed to be about; Transaction, and more about me.

I realised I may have a deep rooted affinity with cats. Through my years cats have tended to be rather fond of me, and they play a significant role in many of my dreams. (Like the one I had last night, though I don’t recall much of the dream, only a hazy image of a cat being there). Since realising that cats are quite accustomed to me, and toying with the idea that I’m actually an incarnation of the Goddess Bast, they’ve started to keep their distance and I’m sure I don’t have to tell you, being snubbed by a cat is pretty disconcerting. Though reason shines through, and I’ve concluded I just must smell different or something.

Today’s been a day like any other day I’ve encountered these past few days. I wake, wonder if I’ve been abducted, recall my dreams, get a coffee, come online. Wonder to myself where the time goes, have a little nap, read some sandman. There was an incident which sparked a household paranoia. One I won’t go into, but now my paranoia has a conflict of interest. Do I keep the light on at night to defer “alien” beings, or do I switch my light off as not to incite unwanted interest from “earthly” beings. It will be interesting to see how this pans out later towards the night. I did have a little excitement before. I had an unbelievable urge for some biscuits to dip into a nice cup of tea and so went on a “Biscuit Quest”, though typically all a “Biscuit Quest” entails is walking to spar. It went without a hitch, and on the way back I realised I’d been undercharged! Woo Hoo, a grand day indeed.

Alexis's Buffy Rant..

Before I get onto the rant, I'll just say a few unrelated to the rant words. So, as expected perhaps not stated to myself on here, but to my head I knew I'd be excited about this new blog and blog daily for a while, and think of excuses to blog. So, in handy time sheet fashioned time statey thing (because I like this blog being all about me), how I have spent the day so far.

10:30am- I wake, collecting my dreams, there were mice, Vanessa Carlton had a reality show that exposed her as a lesbian mouse, and there was a particularly sweet moment where her and her mousey (lesbian) friend shared some dirt labelled "earthquake". Apparently mice like to eat the earth, and earthquake flavoured earth is especially yummy.
I recall lights over phoenix playing a role in my dream, and Wonder Woman’s satin tights being prominent, but I can't place where they fit. I was satisfied that despite my fears, I was not abducted by aliens that night.

11:00am, I go on the computer, and search for Battlestar Galactica and the L word, both season finales, oh I'm excited. Not about the L word, that's shit, but Battlestar excitement!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

11:10-12:20, despite telling myself I shouldn't because it only scares me I return to websites specialising in alien abduction stories, I read through a few and get worried about reptoids. I do a search on reptoids and realise I'm more scared by these than greys, also I find the idea that "alien beings" aren't from other universes or dimensions, they are actually situated underground and evolved from dinosaurs to be quite fascinating. And no, I do not believe any of this, I just find it interesting. I have an imagine in my head that's been scaring me before I go to sleep, it's of alien origin, I try to draw it, but it turns into Gary the snail from spongebob, I laugh, and I'm at ease, and laugh some more.

12:22- I go make me a double sandwich. Consisting of bread, cheese and luncheon meat. I'm joined by Dave who is openly excited about the idea of a double sandwich. I am shocked to learn he never has them. We discuss Joss Whedon and Brian K Vaughn. I express my dislike in how they're swapping over writing the Buffy comic and Runaways. I supposed I've always seen BKV as a lesser Joss Whedon, and when I heard Joss was taking over Runaways it was a reality check that Joss isn't so fantastic after all maybe. I'm not hating on either of them. It was reading BKV's Runaways and laughing out loud that made me realise I wanted to write comics... but he killed off Gert and no. I can never forgive him for it. Arghhhh, why the fuck would you do that?????? Why? And Joss you bastard!!! Anya DID NOT deserve to die, sliced up like butter with only a sentence after thought! You'll suffer for it, the comic will be lacking without her, which I'll state in my Buffy rant... which I should get to now. Before I do, me and Dave reasoned that had it been the Old Testament, Mona the Vampire would have been put to death.

Ok, Buffy rant.

I won't pretend I'm a professional non-bias critic, I'm just some girl who used Buffy as an escape from reality through those "troubling teen" years, and so believes she has the right to critise and express dislike in what once "saved her life". And so, with this statement, don't expect a tight review detailing the story. It's a rant.

First I'm faced with the cover- I'm unimpressed, something's off, perhaps Buffy's navel, or the fact she's wearing a Buffy the Vampire Slayer T Shirt- is it so clever that it's beyond my understanding? Let's for the sake of it assume, yes it is.

I open and read, I don't like it. I don't like how "miliarty- operation" it is. I don't like the double page spread of Buffy and her slayer "army" jumping from a helicopter, I don't like the crap they're wearing, and the guns, I'm unimpressed. What I loved about Buffy was the simplicity, the going into battle in less than ideal garments. Kicking vampire and demon arses in a restricting mini skirt and ridiculous high heels and armed with just a stake... that was the good shit! This... this is cheap.

We find out who's leading this operation, oh my, it's non other than Xander. I do a "ughh/mehh" face, he doesn't translate well through the comic. I wonder what new readers make of him... perhaps I should get someone unfamiliar with Buffy to read it and tell me.

Buffy and co (not the scoobies) are fighting your bog standard big green monster things in a church, Buffy kills one of them with a crucifix through the head. Oh, beautiful green gore.

I'm bored now, I will go on though.

Dawn, Dawn is huge. hahahaha, I like it! I laugh a little, apparently she was with a "thricewise" I'm guessing this creature made her go big after sexual relations. Surely this could be the cringey bit of every comic or story that doesn't work? Perhaps, but it's working for me. I like the sisterly exchange, first I feared the Dawn storyline I heard was going to run throughout, looks like it might actually be this comic’s savour.

We're greeted by some real army type people, or government personals. They're at the Sunnydale ruins, talking about Buffy as some terrorist/cult leader, I get confused, where did Buffy get all her equipment and big computer things if not being reinforced by the government? Meh, I'm sure this will be addressed, I don't think I care. There's a survivor, I get excited, I search for clues in the words, I want my Buffy geekiness to be tested, I encounter this statement...

I scream! I KNOW IT'S AMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I turn the page, and sure enough, there she is. I pat myself on the back. I'm a good Buffy fan, I like how Joss did that, for the fans, I'm too busy congratulating myself to consider how cheap it all really is, and how I really shouldn't claim this as a victory, especially not as something that should do anything other than make you realise what your life has become. It ends on Amy. With a "to be continued"

I think about reading Wonder Woman 5, but remember I have a blog now, and how I'm using any excuse to post, and decide to do a Buffy rant.

Oh new blog euphoria

I'm quite excited about this new blog... not this one I'm writing, nothing to excite yourself over this, but the actual blog site.

Livejournal was sooo 7 years ago. Myspace makes me feel like an attention seeker and don't get me started on Facebook "notes" pffft, oh it grates the very soul of my being.

Well seeing as Uni is almost over, not really, I don’t have lectures anymore, so it feels like the end. I hate this feeling. Come on brain, make it believe it's the beginning, like when I used to play tag with the kids round ours, they'd make me go first telling me that really it's like going last, because once I've caught everyone, it wont be my turn. I was a tarded kid. haha, oh I look back now and see how I was mocked and too dumb to realise it, not anymore, I'm well away of my short comings and I'll be damned if I let anyone else point them out to me or exploit me in anyway. Oh no, this got too personal, I'm just excited, moving on.

Wait, I was talking about Uni, and no lectures means I have more free time (yes, I'm ignoring you essays and exams), and so with this free time I plan to keep up to date with my comic, perhaps make a new layout as much as I enjoy the cheapness of my current one, my eagerness and (bless me) enthusiasm makes me want to do a full flash design, I also want to make this blog awesome looking and update it when there is nothing to say. I'll do random doodles, and post them, and tell myself all about my day, and talk about transaction. Then there will be those paranoid days, were I'll rant on and on, then get even more paranoid and delete my rants, then there’s the depressive days, were I'll moan and mope, and then I'll get paranoid and delete them, and then there will be those angry days, were I'll be an arse, then get paranoid and delete them, there's a lot to look forward to and miss out on.

I'll leave this with a few words of wisdom. I realised the best act of defence if you were to encounter an alien attack would to be in a cluttered room or on the toilet. I reasoned that a cluttered room would cause a disruption to the alien beings, they'd have no place to stand... and I imagine they’d want to come off looking all cool and elegant, be a bit difficult if they're stubbing their alien toes on your knee length boots. And the toilet, well aliens are very clean and sterile (if you are to believe the reports), they wouldn't come abduct you off the toilet, it's degrading for all concerned.